Title: Hidden Courage (R/L)
Author: Tsu
Email:minynkit@ozemail.com.au
Rating: G
Series: Stand Alone
Setting: A few years after events in the movie,
Archive: Yes, although if you could tell me where it ends up that would
be much appreciated :)
Disclaimer: The characters from X-Men (Rogue, Xavier, Jean and Bobby)
belong to Marvel Comics and Twentieth Century Fox Pictures. This story
is for entertainment purposes only and no copyright infringement is
intended.
Author's notes: This is my first x-men fanfic and one of the few
fanfics I've actually written. Feedback would be very much appreciated.
"Try it Rogue, you wouldn't know till you do it. We'll be there with
you all the way." Jean coaxed her.
"No, I can't. You wouldn't stand a chance of recovering ... I'm afraid
of what I'll do to you." Rogue tried to back out of it.
"You'll have to try it sometime, otherwise all our progress would have
been for nothing." Bobby said to her. "We know you can do it, trust
us, trust yourself."
"Later perhaps, but not with you ... I just can't..." Rogue said, her
voice barely
audioble. Her whole body seemed in anguish to those around her.
"Tis a lonely path you walk child. Beware the coming storm and make
your choice soon." Professor Xavier said to Rogue in a soft and
understanding manner.
"...Thank you..." Rogue said as she turned away from the group.
'She is afraid, the poor kid.' Jean Grey thought as she watched Rogue
move away from them.
'Yes, afraid, lonely and longing for love too far away...' The
professor's thoughts joined hers as the rest of the group watched on.
---
Later that night in her room, Rogue fell asleep trying to find solace in
her memories.
'As much as I wish too, I cannot. You haven't seen the things that
haunt me ...'
'The darkness I can bear...'
'So too the silence and fear...'
'The nightmares I welcome...'
'But not the longing, the touch...'
'Nor love...'
'For they give hope. Hope to hear those precious few words again...'
'Yet hope turns to despair for I cannot bear the wait.'
'Yet I wait, for no one understands me like you do...'
'...'
'...'
'Why do you not trust them? They can help you.' A voiced asked.
'Who are you?' Startled, Rogue looked up from the floor when she heard
the voice. It sounded so familiar.
'I am you, Marie, Rogue, the kid ... I'm everything that you are and
that which you could be... You created me, as you do all other
things here. This is your world, the sanctuary you created to escape
from reality. This is ... your dream.' The voice said. This version
of Rogue looked a few years older, more beautiful yet at the same time a
sense of sadness permeated around her.
'Dream? What do you mean?' Rogue asked.
'Remember the day he left Marie? That night you cried yourself to
sleep, wishing that you could somehow delay his departure. Playing all
the possible scenarios over and over again yet knowing none could have
worked, only the hope that he would keep his promise to come back to you
managed to calm you down?' Rogue's mirror said to her.
'I ... I do. That night I had one of his nightmares again and... and
there was a soothing voice telling me that everything would be all
right. That was you? ...' Rogue said suddenly when she made the
connection.
'...and so you created me then, you willed it so. You had to believe
that everything would eventually fall into place, and everything would
be all right. So every time you dreamt, we went forward together.
Everything that I said or did, you brought to life.' Rogue's mirror
smiled at her.
'And now, you're here because it has something to do with my refusal?'
Rogue
thought.
'...' Rogue's mirror remained silent, waiting...
'You too believe it is time... I don't know, I'm afraid I will cause
someone pain again.' Rogue said.
'We both know that is not true. You already know that they would never
risk it if they thought you weren't ready to take the trial. They love
you and want what's best for you. We are ready, and you know that. You
just need to hear yourself say it. That's what I'm for.' Rogue's
mirror smiled at her while reaching out to push stray strands of hair of
her name's sake back into place.
Rogue found herself smiling, 'Well ... maybe not everything that is best
for me, but I'll try.'
'I know you'll make us all proud ... especially him. Hold on for a
while longer and he'll be back soon. Good bye dear, you know where to
find us if you need us...' Rogue's mirror said for the final time
before fading away as Rogue's whole world faded away.
---
The next morning Rogue came down to Jean at breakfast. Knowing that it
was now or never Rogue looked intently at Jean. "I'm ready..."
Jean nodded while smiling knowingly and said, "But first breakfast, I'm
sure you're famished after skipping supper last night..." As she
wrapped her arm around the younger girl and guided her towards the
kitchen.
--
"Who is this? This is me. Who am I? I am I. This object that is myself,
that which forms what is me." - Ayanami Rei.
"I've learned from observing that humans sometimes require
a...pretext...for being intimate with one another."
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